The Choice of Happiness

The plight of us humans is so odd and funny. We are taught to be independent, self-reliant and resilient, to be original – yet we depend on others for our peace, happiness or love. We become externally dependent on our spouse, children, job, colleagues… sometimes to the extent that some rash, random driver we come across on the road, can rob our peace of mind, ruining the day.

All these issues can be successfully overcome if we consciously choose a shift of attention, from outside to inside – to our own thoughts, feelings and actions.

Here are a few things one can do when in a ‘stuck’ situation:

  • Intent to resolve the problem: It’s seen that we humans get too comfortable with our problems that we love to discuss it, cry over it or even sleep over it -and then complain about lack of sleep!!! The intention and the conscious willingness to identify and resolve the core issue is very important, if we want to move forward.
  • Make the problem a challenge: When we see something as a problem, we see it in present tense – but when we look at it as a challenge, we look towards the goal and we search for solutions.
  • Step out of the box: Taking a moment to pause and reflect in third person, will surely give us a better perspective of our issues. It’s like the top view of a maze – we get to see the endpoint and the path towards it.
  • Interrupt the pattern: Our brain weaves stories, based on our past memories. When we are faced with challenges or negative situations, our brain brings in all the negative emotions which we felt in our past in similar situations – resulting in a spiral of negative thoughts and actions resulting in the escalation of the issue. When these unconscious spirals are identified using stepping-out-of-the-box method, our brain is forced to find new thoughts. We then start to respond with conscious logical actions, rather than unconscious pre-programmed reactions of anger, sadness, hurt, etc.
  • Clarity on objectives: Be clear on what you want  not  on what you don’t want”. When you know about what you want, your mind will come up with the right kind of attitude and ideas for attaining it. The energy will come from within and instead of sadness and frustration, you feel hopeful. Anger gets replaced with new perspectives and soon your ‘problems’ will become ‘lessons’ – preparing you for more learning.


Intend to be happy! Always remember the choice is ours…  If  you find challenges in following the steps, contact me it would be a privilege to support you.